1) At the same time step-parent adoptions have been discouraged and have almost halved since the Children Act 1975.

2) Social-science research on stepparent families has underscored the point that biological ties are surprisingly difficult to duplicate.

3) Parents and step-parents are increasingly writing about step-family life in an attempt both to warn parents and inform practitioners.

4) Many new step-parents will admit to having mixed emotions about their new family.

5) Children will be pulled in two directions between their natural parents and may well have tense relationships with their step-parents.

6) Children can be reluctant to accept a stepparent; raising kids leaves newlyweds little time to gain intimacy.

7) Your parents and new stepparent might not have thought about the things you're asking either, so there's an opportunity to explore options together.

8) For example, even when someone likes a new stepparent, it's natural to feel some pangs that this new person is "replacing" a beloved parent in some way.

9) A stepparent is different; he or she is someone your mom or dad has invited into the family.

10) Take comfort in the fact that if the stepparent is sincere in his or her effort to build a relationship, positive feelings will likely outweigh negative ones eventually.

11) So what can you do to adjust to the daily realities of living with a stepparent?

12) Even if you don't have negative feelings about the new person in your family, you may have very strong feelings about the changes a stepparent is creating.

13) But I do not mean to give you the idea that talk is all it takes to be a good parent or stepparent.

14) Some of your close,[http:///stepparent.html] trusted friends may have their own stepparent experiences that can help you feel you're not alone.

15) Instead of worrying about the "what ifs" and the inevitable changes, talk to your mom or dad about what to expect before your new stepparent joins the family.

16) He is the parent of two children and the stepparent to another by his second marriage.

17) Don't overreact. If your child criticizes his or her stepparent, try not to overreact.

18) Encourage respect. Remember, it may take time for your child and his or her new stepparent to develop a relationship.

19) For example, figure out ahead of time what to call your stepparent.